In college, meeting people is so easy. You made friends in class, walking through campus, studying in the library, at parties, in organizations… the list goes on and on. #AdultLife makes finding new friends WAY harder.
Luckily, a lot of other postgrads in your city are in the exact same boat! Here are some tips and tricks to meet them and create your own F•R•I•E•N•D•S spinoff. I tried to order them from safest to gutsiest so you can work up to them 😉
#1: Your Building
You chose to live in your apartment building most likely because of the location, amenities, and price. Guess who also finds those things attractive? People your age. There are bound to be lots of them living in your very same building. If your building holds happy hours and events like my first apartment building did, BOOM – there’s your ticket to meeting new friends. If your building does nothing of the sort like my current apartment building, you’re still going to run into people waiting in the lobby for your Uber, getting packages out of the mail room, or doing laundry. All are great opportunities to smile, say hi, and get into a nice convo if time should allow. Plus, these potential friends live floors away from you! Talk about the hang out opportunities.
Okay, a lot of you may be groaning right now, but hear me out. There will be your “work friends,” people you socialize with at work, but then there will be your “friends from work,” who are people you genuinely enjoy and just happen to work with. The latter will be the people you stay close with even after you leave your company, and are a great way to meet people from other colleges who live in your city and have established friend groups.
#3: Your Friends’ Work Friends
If you’re like, I have no friends at work that I’m close enough with to see out of the office, then I bet one of your college friends does! Ask to tag along to a happy hour or other casual setting where you can mingle and get to know them better. Some of my good friends here in the city were introduced to me by their coworkers!
#4: The Gym
Or yoga, or barre, or whatever workout class you frequent. I made friends with the girls who also hid in the back of the Pure Barre studio, far away from the mirrors showing us our bad form. We always attended the same class (6:00 MWF) and started saving “spots” for one another. Eventually, someone suggested we get drinks after barre, and that is the night we became actual friends instead of just “barre” friends.
#5: Your Hobbies
This is separate from #3 because as much as some people call working out a hobby, most everyone works out. Not everyone likes the same hobbies you do, and the shared love of unique things, like painting, antiquing or gardening will be a great base on which to build a friendship. Are there any cooking classes you want to try to improve your techniques? I bet there will be someone there you click with and can share your love of cooking with!
#6: Your Significant Other’s Friend’s SOs
I tried to make that gender neutral hahaha, but this is how this works: You ask your BF/GF to get some of his friends and their significant others together for dinner, drinks, trivia, a sports game, etc. You get the chance to meet other people slightly outside your social circle, and I’m sure it will make life far easier for your BF/GF if his friends’ girlfriends become friends!
#7: Bumble BFF
There are horror stories and success stories alike for this one, but if you try to vet your BFF “matches” as best as possible, you may find a new brunch buddy. S/O to Jordan, my first Chicago #adult friend that I met on there a few weeks after moving to the city – we both were nervous the other was crazy, but those worries subsided after bottomless mimosas at brunch, and we’re still friends!
#8: Going Places Alone
Do you want to go to the art museum but your friends aren’t into it? Go alone. Worst case, you take in some art and enjoy your day. Best case, you meet someone else doing the exact same thing. This can also be done at Starbucks or another coffee place on the weekends. Bring your laptop, a notebook, or whatever you need to work on, and just sit for a few hours. There almost always is someone else your age with the cutest sense of style doing the same thing. I know this may be out of your comfort zone, but you should go say hi and pay her a compliment. After it’s established that you’re a nice potential friend, she may ask you to join her. (This is a little like friend dating, I know… but honestly, it WORKS!)
Good luck finding your #adult friends! It really does get easier with time and practice (and when you completely stop caring if people think you’re weird like I do)