a letter to my freshman self

Dear freshman me,

Spoiler alert: You did it! Or, at least, you WILL do it! I know it seems daunting now, but every late night and early morning will be worth it in just four years. It may feel like ages away, but sooner than you know it, you will be walking out of your last college exam and promptly heading to Harry’s. You will have an amazing college experience. The next four years will teach you so much (obviously, you’re getting a degree!) but even more important than your academic success is what you will learn about life and about yourself.

It’s okay if you’re not best friends with the people in your orientation group. Use them as a safe space to feel comfortable in your new environment and to eventually branch out. It’s okay if it takes you a little while to open up and make meaningful friendships, just know that you will.

Not everyone adjusts as well as they seem. In the beginning of college, everyone generally is enjoying the new lifestyle and independence, but do not feel alone in your occasional homesickness and longing for your high school friends. Everyone else has those same moments of weakness, even months and years after starting college.

Do not judge people based on a title. Whether it is a position on a sports team, a certain greek affiliation, or even being an international student, these titles do not define anyone or make them a better or worse person. Furthermore, do not allow yourself to become friends with people who care about these titles.

You will change. You will go through periods of trying to figure out what makes you happy, what defines you, what your beliefs are, and your reality will continually be tested. Accept the changes that will occur. They will make you into a better version of who you were and set your life in the right direction.

Group projects suck. You’ll probably end up doing the majority of the work yourself, and though it’s extremely aggravating, this will prepare you for the real world where not everyone carries their weight. Once in a while, you’ll get lucky and end up with another overachiever and you’ll get not only a good grade out of the project, but a new friend.

People grow apart. As you change and become who you’re meant to be, your friends and loved ones are doing the same. Sometimes, you get put on diverging paths. Though it may be sad, who you now are isn’t who you were when that relationship blossomed. You both have new and differing needs that you no longer can fulfill for one another. It is a part of life. Accept it and always remember that person with a smile on your face.

Invest in a good planner. Time management is key to succeeding in both your classes and your extracurricular activities. Start early when COM 114 is one of your biggest worries so you’ll be ready for the big leagues.

Your mom has always been, and will always be, right. The sooner you realize it, the better.

The Freshman 15 is real. Learn how to limit yourself at parties and the dining courts, and start hitting up that awesome gym you get to use for free. Your weight doesn’t define you, but you need to be physically and mentally healthy to succeed in college.

Forget about the people who forgot about you. I’ve been told “You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there still will be someone who doesn’t like peaches.” That being said, continue moving forward with your head held high because it’s not worth the energy or the tears. (You also will discover Sephora, and your makeup will become too expensive to waste crying off over a boy who wronged you or a friend who stabbed you in the back)

Become a part of something bigger than yourself. Grades are important and all, but nothing is more fulfilling than seeing the dreams you have for an organization come to fruition.

Be better, not bitter. When people upset you, you have to choose to let it go. Bitterness binds you to the moment and inhibits you from being able to move forward. Allow yourself to feel the sting, but take that feeling and use it as a learning moment. Never treat someone the way you were just treated because you know just how it feels.

Karma is legit. Don’t even think about getting back at those who’ve hurt you because the universe is already on it (plus, you’re better than that). Make sure you’re putting out positive vibes, and you’ll get positivity back.

Once you find yourself, don’t lose yourself. Even if who you are isn’t accepted by everyone or you’re considered different, do not change yourself to fit who others want you to be.

The cure to anything is laughing with your friends. Preferably, this happens with food in your hand and a romcom on the TV. Once you turn 21, wine might will come into the mix. Even if they don’t know what to say to make it better, their love and support for you will do the job.

Everything happens for a reason. You got stuck with a bad professor for SPAN 201 so you could complain to the girl next to you who ends up becoming your best friend. You didn’t get a leadership position in an organization because you’ll soon get an even better one that would have conflicted with the first. Understand that nothing is random and it is all a part of the greater plan. Trust in that.

You are incredibly and unconditionally loved. Never forget it.

You are in for a crazy ride, but you’ll love every second of it. It’ll be over before you know it.

 

xoxo